I am breaking the silence as a black African American male who silently is a survivor of multiple sexual assaults. I was assaulted twice as a kid by other kids I had known and as an adult in a toxic relationship where physical and sexual abuse occurred. It's the kind of trauma that made me feel weaker inside than I already was. It changed my mind, made me scared and fearful about trusting others.

Living with that in silence and having audio in my head saying, "it doesn't happen to men because men always control the power." I now say that any abuser holds power regardless of gender roles.

I hated myself, and I already had issues loving my own body and its unique chrematistics. These events made it even harder for me to see my body in the mirror. It made it hard for me to see myself as a man in my own eyes. I told myself that I would be a man if I just held it inside, stood firm, and laughed it off.

One of the best quotes I've heard was from an anonymous male survivor blog posting:

"Healing is Feeling"

You are not alone. I believe that if we are feeling, we are on the road toward proper healing for all of us. My name is Joshua Dixon, and I'm a survivor of multiple things, and one of them is sexual abuse. I stand with and alongside you in this fight and journey towards healing and self-love. I advocate for mental health awareness and many communities of survivors. All of the trauma I endured in life fuels Admire Wear and its mission to help save lives like mine and yours